After arriving into the 3D blackness, and because I was unsure of where I wanted to go or do, I decided to just hang and enjoy the relaxing and vast "space" around me. Well apparently Helpers had other plans as I saw one then move quickly to me and off we went.
Ahead I saw what appeared to be dark booths or squared-off small tents arranged side by side...a string of lights glowing softly in the contrasting blackness. I approached one booth as I could perceive someone standing back in the corner, almost completely hidden in the darkness. I smiled, said hi, and sensed great reluctance from the individual to come out of the dark corner. In asking what this person was doing here, at the "carnival", a large figure then tentatively moved toward me and I saw a tall black man, round belly, wearing worn out pants and shirt. He picked up a plate and spooned food onto it, handing it to me without further communication. I held the plate very close to my face because I wanted to really "see/smell" the food, and clearly saw mustard greens, BBQ ribs, and a kind of potato dish I didn't recognize. I beamed back a grin and told him the food was excellent, as I began eating as if very hungry. This seemed to help him open up a little as he then came out of the shadows, his huge eyes watching me with uncertainty.
I then suddenly found myself (?) squatted down in a field of some kind of crop...and recognized the plants to be cotton. I didn't have time to really look around as I was consumed with fear...experiencing a fear of "being discovered by others" in this field (and this was interesting: as I was experiencing this state of mind I knew it wasn't mine...so it didn't really bother me----if that makes sense). And in a blink I was back at the carnival booth, still "ooing and ahhing" over his food.
I introduced myself and he told me his name was Sam, Sam Collins. Some called him Sammy. I then mentioned the fact that there weren't other people at this carnival, how I found that kind of odd. His eyes reflected uncertainty as he looked around, saying nothing...He then took a step back into his booth. I told him I had a very kind person with me, a friend who could offer him protection and even escort him to others he would find loving. Sam tried to say something at this point but obvious emotions welling up had him tongue-tied. Tears reflected the carnival lights. I felt the Helper step up to the booth on my left and although Sam remained fixed in the shadows, he eventually walked out of his booth. I waited as the two engaged in a conversation I had no perception of...and when the message came to send him PUL I did this. Sam was then nodding, expressing a willingness to leave as the Helper took his arm.
And they were then gone.
Much love to all,
The part about being in fear in the field is really interesting. Sometimes in retrievals we directly experience the "feelings" of the person, like being in that field. And sometimes when that happens we don't realize it's not "our" feeling and react to it as if it is. Big congrats on allowing that feeling just to flow through without taking it on.
Ginny's response backBruce,
And I may not have described well what happened in that moment. The only thing I can draw on is perhaps what it's like while watching a movie of someone experiencing fear: you may find yourself also feeling that fear, but you know it's a "production" or "someone else's experience". (?)
What's also interesting is that since I've been exploring and meeting others beyond F27, where I was shown or information was given to me through a process of me "instantly being IN a scene, in 3D, color", this seems to be happening now in retrievals on and off. It's kinda neat actually and I get the feeling that Helpers find this less tedious?---(grin)! They've always had such great patience in waiting for me to "get stuff" during retrievals.