Entitled "Self Retrieval?

Posted by Alice on June 01, 2001 at 12:14:26:

Hi all, I'd like to share today's exploration.

I had lain down and started with "I am much more than my physical body" but since I never memorized the thing word for word, I always play around with it and it comes out different every time. But usually it does contain all the original elements. But this time I found myself changing it quite a bit. I asked to become more aware of the totality of myself, to integrate more of that, as much as I could hold at this stage of my development. Thoughts of the concept of surrender floated through this affirmation too. Then I asked for the assistance of those beings who's understanding and development was equal or greater than my own, and I added somewhat humorously, 'but preferably greater' :) and I asked for protection from anything that would provide me with less than my stated desire.

Then, between recalling my drifting thoughts again and again, I became aware of standing on a meadow at the edge of a forest and a dog running around there. It seemed to be a Dalmatian. Then my thoughts reminded me of the dog that was closest to me, but he is not a Dalmatian. It's not that I 'saw' the dog. It was just the impression of movement that was reminiscent of a Dalmatian. There was no black and white impression of it's fur. It's hard to describe.

Then I got the feeling that the friendly little fellow wanted me to follow him, so I did. Then I stood in front of a door and I entered. There was a longish hallway with several doors along it's right side. I knew that in the room facing the entrance door at the end of the hallway, was a body lying on a bed. Now I thought that this is a retrieval. I had totally forgotten about my stated desire!

I proceeded towards that last room. But suddenly I found myself in a room that seemed to be like a kitchen, and I had a big yellow sponge in my hand and was soaking up something that seemed to be rather liquid and I knew that to be the essence of a person. When the sponge had soaked it all up I went to the room with the corpse lying on a bed and I started to wash the corpse with my yellow sponge. Sometimes I pressed out the contents of the sponge over the body, then I washed it again, trying to get the liquid stuff to enter the corpse. But the corpse didn't wake up and rise and walk ;-) So I made it sit up and I started to pretend that it's alive. And just when I had the impression that this was working, I started to get a very pleasant cool feeling at the top of my head that replaced the feeling of pressure at the right side of my forehead and temple that I usually get during my forays to the other side and which had been very strong this time.

This ended the experience and I remembered my stated desire. All the while I had been under the expression of doing a retrieval. Now I think that I was probably trying to retrieve myself somehow. Maybe I regard myself as a walking corpse because I am not constantly consciously aware of the living presence within?

And is my own understanding and development really less than that of a friendly little doggie jumping around and just enjoying the meadow of existence? LOL - I guess I should lighten up some more :-)

It's great to have this board (and Lyn's future place;-)) to share things and know that others will understand what I'm talking about :-)

Love and Light,
Alice